CONVERSATIONS WITH MY FATHER

Do you ever talk to yourself. I mean those conversations that go on in your head. I do. Often. Especially when I’m spending intentional time in prayer or in His Word. I’ve always considered them a distraction. Something I needed to block out. Something that keeps me from my intention of spending time with God. This morning I had a different thought about them. Maybe they aren’t conversations with myself. Maybe, just maybe they are the conversations I’m having with God. Maybe, just maybe those are the conversations going on between my heart and His. All of these posts that I’ve been doing are a result of those conversations. After today I don’t think I’ll be looking on them as distractions. I think I will just sit back and enjoy these conversations with Dad.

TAKE THIS CUP

Have you ever had God ask you to do something hard? I mean really hard. Something you thought you could never do. In the garden the night He was betrayed He asked His Father to remove the cup before Him. He wavered in what He was being asked to do. But His desire was to do His Father’s will and He resolved Himself to doing just that. He’s asking one of those things from me right now. He showed me what He wanted me to do weeks ago and the time is coming that I’m going to have to make a choice. It’s not much of a choice at all really. I’m resolved to do His will. Please don’t get me wrong. No choice He puts before us can compare to the choice Jesus had to make.

Yes, I have wavered. Many times. Is this really what God wants me to do? Wouldn’t it be better to just let this pass? But I know what God has told me and I will do it. 

“And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”” Mark‬ ‭14‬:‭36‬ ‭ESV‬‬

IN THE VALLEY

I’ve talked about the mountaintops and the valleys previously and right now I’m in a valley. The trek down the mountain was a bit hard. It’s hard to go from seeing so clearly to having your view obscured by life. Now that I’m in the valley, my times with God are becoming refreshing. A time of refreshing and becoming reacquainted with my Saviour. Yes, sometimes...well, maybe often...those old fears creep in. Sometimes it’s hard to see where the path ahead lies. 

I mentioned yesterday that I’m spending time in the Gospel of John.  It’s helping me through the valley to focus on Jesus and who He is. Right now I can see God’s blessings in my life. It’s not always that way though. Take the blind man in John chapter nine. Jesus was asked by His disciples who had sinned, this man or His parents. I’ve read these words many times but Jesus’s reply really struck me this morning. He said “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in Him.” (John 9:3). Recently God freed me from a couple things that I had struggled with most of my life. He healed me. He’s given me some real insight as to why I struggled with them in the first place. I think this morning He was telling me why I went through that. “So that the works of God might be displayed in him”. 

So, whether you have struggled with something your entire life or you are going through a particularly difficult time, keep in mind that God may just be taking you through that in order that His works might be displayed in you. 

TO BE LIKE JESUS

I’ve heard it said that Jesus was both 100% man and 100% God while in His human form. I don’t pretend to be a theologian but I’m not sure about that. I believe he gave up the 100% God part when he was born in a manger. I may be totally off base here but my reason for saying that is because “we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.” (Hebrews‬ ‭4‬:‭15‬ ‭ESV‬‬). In order to be tempted as we are, he had to be 100% man and nothing else. Otherwise He still would not have been able to “sympathize with our weaknesses”. That creates another question though. If He was truly 100% man, how did He not sin? Years ago I taught an adult Sunday School class using Henry Blackaby’s book entitled “Experiencing God: Knowing & Doing the Will of God”. The basic premise is to have such a deep personal relationship with God that you can see what He is doing around you and to join Him in that work. That’s what Jesus had while on earth. I think He had such a deep relationship and love with the Father that He was able to both resist the temptations before Him and that the Father was able to work through Him in the ways He did. 

I’ve been reading in John’s Gospel during my morning times with God lately. Jesus talks a lot about His relationship with His Father.  I prayed that I would become more and more like Jesus. That’s a wonderful thing to desire. Then the whole magnitude of that prayer hit me.  To become like Jesus? I would have to totally give up myself. Totally. Nothing held back. Honestly, that’s kind of a scary thought. But I know God helps us take baby steps. One day at a time. After all, He really does “sympathize with our weaknesses”.  

RIGHTEOUSNESS

I’m a Christ follower. As such, God’s word calls me righteous. Me. That is something I have always had trouble wrapping my head around. I don’t feel very righteous. In fact quite the opposite. I don’t act very righteous most of the time. But God calls me righteous. Amazing!

I’m in a men’s Bible study that is studying the book of Romans. Romans talks a lot about the righteousness of believers and I think I’m coming to understand it a bit better. You see, Paul makes it clear that Israel missed the point because they were seeking righteousness based on living according to the Law given to Moses. What God wanted was for them to live by faith in the promised Messiah. That is the righteousness that comes from God who knew it was impossible for fallen man to achieve it on their own merit. But through the Messiah promised to Israel, who is Jesus Christ, everyone has the opportunity to be called righteous by God. Simply by believing in who Jesus is.

I’m just starting to get my head wrapped around it. It’s becoming easier to understand that I am righteous. Not on my on merit. If that were true I’d give up now. But through the blood of Jesus Christ I have been forgiven and made righteous. 

“But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it— the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith.”  Romans‬ ‭3‬:‭21‬-‭25‬ ‭ESV‬‬

PRIDE

Pride is a very sneaky thing. It crawls into areas of our life without our even realizing it. Or at least without our being willing to admit it. Yesterday morning as our pastor was preaching he confessed to his own pride in being a people pleaser. That really got me to thinking. In what way does pride sneak into my life. I have to confess that a lot of times what I do is more motivated by a desire for people to look on me as something special. 

Take this blog for instance. I really do want it to touch people and help others that may be going through the same struggles as I am. To let them know they aren’t alone. However, there’s that other little voice in my head that wants to shout “look at me, look at what God’s doing in my life, I’m so special”. I don’t think that’s the Holy Spirit’s voice. I can’t begin to tell you how hard that is to admit not just to you but also to myself. But God usually has to “knock me over the head” in order to get me to give those things to Him. My dog Buddy isn’t very good at obeying when he has something he shouldn’t have and I tell him to drop it. I’m kind of like that when God asks me to “drop it” when it comes to sins like pride, self-centeredness, having a critical attitude and all those other “little” sins (they usually aren’t so little) that sneak into our lives. 

So once again I come before Jesus asking Him to cleanse my heart and mind and helping me along this journey with Him. 

THE ART OF NEIGHBORING (Pt 2)

A few more thoughts from my post yesterday. I’ve come to realize that part of my issues in trying to develop relationships with my neighbors is that I feel the pressure of having to find opportunities to share the gospel. That sharing the good news of Jesus should be my ultimate goal. I realize now that’s not necessarily true. The second greatest commandment says “love your neighbor”. Period. It doesn’t say “love your neighbor so you can evangelize them”. Just “love your neighbor”. For me, that takes a HUGE burden off of me. We should never have ulterior motives when we love others. I believe Jesus won more followers with His actions than He did with His words. The thing is, if we truly love others, opportunities to tell them about Jesus may naturally occur. But that’s up to the Holy Spirit to work, not me to force. Sure, God may present us opportunities to share Him without having had the opportunity to really love them through building a relationship.  That person sitting in the seat next to you on the plane  that is obviously having some real struggles. That person in the doctor’s office that is anticipating some heart breaking news. Even in these rare situations our motive should simply be to love them. If that leads to sharing Jesus great. If not, that’s just fine. Simply loving them may be that seed that God uses to begin softening their hearts even if you never mention Him.

Like I said, realizing this has lifted a great burden from me and I think I may actually be able to start loving my neighbor more. Both literally and figuratively. 

THE ART OF NEIGHBORING

 I went to a seminar this morning that our church  had entitled “The Art of Neighboring”. The main speaker was one of the co-authors of a book with the same title. He acknowledged that the parable of the Good Samaritan was meant to imply that everyone are our “neighbors” but he also challenged us to take it literally. A huge step out of my comfort zone. I had spent the last couple weeks reading the book and I’ll have to admit that it was a bit...well...a lot overwhelming for me. I almost didn’t go but knew that I needed to hear what he had to say. You see, I’ve been praying lately that God would help me to love others in a very tangible way. I hate to admit it but often I’m simply unaware of the people around me. Don’t get me wrong. I love being around people. That is as long as I don’t have to actually interact with them. That’s one of the walls that God is breaking down in me and this message hit me at just the right time. The speaker asked us to write down the names of the people in the closest eight homes to us. I have to admit that other than my immediate neighbors I really don’t know a lot of them. I pretty much always left those social interactions up to my wife. One of the points the speaker made was how can you love your literal neighbors if you don’t even know their names. 

I think God used the message this morning to give me another tool to help break down one of those walls I’ve talked about. I know it will take baby steps but I need to continue this adventure He has me on.  

BUDDY

Buddy is my dog. He’s been teaching me a lot lately about both my relationship with God and His with me. No matter how busy I get and pretty much ignore him, he’s always waiting for me when I come to him. His love is totally unconditional. That’s how God’s love is. 

I’m on the way down the mountain I’ve talked about. The terrain sometimes gets rough. The discouragement sets in. I begin to doubt my ability to continue on the path He’s set me on. Dad reminded me of something today using Buddy. It snowed here yesterday. Not a lot. A few inches. Even though he’s not a big dog, Buddy loves to go out and run in the snow. This morning the temperature was -6 when I got up. Normally I just let him out and let him run as long as he wants. When it gets this cold I stay pretty close to the door. I had let him out and was about ready to call him in when he came up the steps onto the deck. He barely made it. He couldn’t come any farther no matter how much I coaxed him. His poor frozen paws just couldn’t carry him any further. I rushed out on the snow covered deck in my slippers and grabbed him and carried him the rest of the way. That’s what God does for us when we just can’t go any further. He comes to us and carries us as far as we need. That’s what He did for me this morning as I spent time with Him in His Word.

I’m glad to report that Buddy recovered quickly. As soon as I wiped his paws he was off and running with a definite case of the zoomies.

THE PSALMS

 For as long as I can remember I’ve always been drawn to the Psalms in the Bible. I don’t come from a church going family and I never really had any spiritual guidance whatsoever.  In the bookcase in our bedroom my brother had a New Testament Bible with the Psalms included.  I think he got it from the Gideons. I’m not sure when or how but at some point I pulled that out and was immediately drawn to the Psalms.  Somehow they just seemed to be comforting. I’ve realized since then how God was beginning to draw me toward Him years before I would eventually give Him my life. 

One of the things I’ve struggled with are the Psalms that talk of David’s enemies. I never really saw that as relevant to me. I really don’t have any enemies. I get along with most people and they seem to at least tolerate me.  As I was reading them this morning I had an epiphany of sorts. I understood I do have enemies. A lot of them. Fear, self-doubt, self-loathing. I could go on and on. For some of you that may not be much of a revelation. It’s actually pretty obvious. But sometimes Dad doesn’t let us see the obvious until we are really ready. This morning was that time for me. The Psalms took on a whole new life. Daddy’s love became even more clear. Thank you Father!

COMMUNITY

 Community.  The Bible refers to it as fellowship. I’ve been out of fellowship with other believers on a consistent basis for years. I’m not talking about the surface “how are you doing” behavior that we all engage in on a daily basis. That definitely serves a purpose and we have to start somewhere but I’m talking about really being engaged with others. Sharing our struggles, frustrations, weaknesses, victories, and so on. I recently saw that in action in a men’s Bible study I’m attending. One of the men shared that when he’s had a rough day and is tired, that’s when the doubts start creeping in. I definitely agreed. I don’t like to speak for others but I really think the rest of the men at our table also agreed. I struggle with doubt at the end of most days. But knowing that it’s not just me, that I’m not alone, is such an encouragement. That’s why community is so important. We begin to see that we are not all alone. Others face the same struggles as we do.

If you are in a group or even just in a relationship that you would like to see become a little deeper but doesn’t seem to be, there’s a solution. Take the first step. Share your own struggles. It may not have an immediate effect, but keep at it. I’m not saying it’s easy but I will say it’s worth it. I’m just beginning to see that in my own life.

DISTRACTIONS

“One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple.”  Psalm‬ ‭27‬:‭4‬

Ever since a friend shared this verse with me years ago, I have sought to make it my life’s verse. The problem is I’m easily distracted. “Easily” is way too mild of a word.  I remember my mom coming home from a parent/teacher conference one time, I think I was in third grade, and telling me how the teacher mentioned she could always see me drifting off into my own little world. And it seemed to happen often.  I hate to say I haven’t outgrown that trait. I drift off easily. Whether in a group or individually, a certain word or idea will grab ahold of me and my mind will wander, following that thought but not the conversation. And if I do come back to the conversation, I may just pull everyone down that rabbit hole with me.  In fact, I just pulled you down one. I drifted away from what I really wanted to talk about. 

The point I’m trying to make is that I wander out of the “house of the Lord” way too often. It doesn’t take much to get me through that door. I’ve been trying to spend more intentional time with the Lord each morning. In talking with Him (prayer) and listening to Him (His Word). It doesn’t take much for my mind to begin wandering. My dog will try to get my attention by bringing me a multitude of his toys, my phone will ding telling me I have a text, something will catch my eye out my window or a myriad of other things. In these cases I usually don’t wander too far from His house. It’s the temptations I face that cause the real problems. And even more, the temptations I give in to. But like the father of the prodigal son, my Dad is always waiting there, with open arms, to welcome me home. 

ON SACRIFICE

 “He said, “Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.”” ‭‭Genesis‬ ‭22‬:‭2‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I watched a movie tonight. It’s called “His Only Son” and it’s the story of God commanding Abraham to sacrifice his son. It’s a very well done movie. God was asking Abraham to make the greatest sacrifice possible. An unimaginable sacrifice. If you’re a parent you can understand that.

“So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him.”  ‭‭Genesis‬ ‭22‬:‭3‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Abraham rose early in the morning. Seriously? No argument? No debating with himself as to whether he would really do it? No screaming “NO” at God. He knew God and he knew God’s promises and he trusted God. Completely. He did eventually ask God to allow it not to be but he still obeyed.

I realize that this was a foreshadowing of His sacrifice of His own Son, Jesus but I think there’s application for us in this. Has God asked you to make sacrifices. He’s asked me. Oh they aren’t near as extreme as what he asked of Abraham. Not even close. But sacrifices I’m terrified to make. Sacrifices of my fears. So many of them. My fear of rejection. My fear of being misunderstood. My fear of looking foolish. Sacrifices of my desires. Sacrifices of my dreams. There’s a common denominator here. The word “My”. God has greater plans. I just need to lay myself on His alter. 

In case you don’t know the rest of the story God told Abraham not to harm his son at the last moment. 

ON GIVING UP

 I woke up in the middle of the night last night. Nothing unusual. I usually fall right back to sleep. Not last night. As I shared a couple days ago, I’ve been on a mountaintop. I’m sensing that I’m starting to descend into the valley. I’ll be honest. The valley scares me. I woke up last night wondering how I can survive it. You see, I tend to be a quitter. When things get tough, I give up. Not on God, but on myself. Not something that builds a sense of pride and accomplishment in a person. I cried out to God. He calmed me enough to get back to sleep but it was a fitful sleep. This morning in my time with Him, I cried out again. He calmed me again. 

Then, when I got in my car to run some errands, I heard God’s voice. In a sense it was an audible voice. When I turned on my radio, the very first words I heard  were “God never gives up on you, why would you give up on yourself”. Mind blown 🤯.